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Wednesday, September 18, 2013

First Annual Character Awards Result Show, Part 4

Warning! Contains Mark of Athena spoilers!

(Character Awards theme music plays)

Apollo: And we're back! With us we have the Three 
Fates, presenting the award for... hmm, 
how appropriate... Most Heartbreaking Death!

(Three Fates enter stage)

Lachesis: Hello.

Clotho: We are here to present the award for the 
Most Heartbreaking Death.

Atropos: Which is most
 definitely our area.

Clotho: Our area? You mean your area!

Atropos: Don't look at me! Lachesis is the one 
who measures the strings!

Lachesis: Me? You're the one who breaks 
everyone's hearts! You pick the manner in 
which they die!

Hermes: Ladies.

Clotho: Oh. We apologize.

Lachesis: The nominees are...
Luke Castellan, who nobly sacrificed himself to defeat the Titan Kronos
Zoe Nightshade, who was poisoned by the dragon Ladon
and fell in battle against her father, Atlas
Silena Beauregard, who perished
 after battling a drakon 
during the Battle of Manhattan
Charles Beckendorf, who was killed in the explosion 
of the Princess Andromeda
Bianca di Angelo, who died whilst attempting
to shut off a prototype of Talos from the inside
Festus the automaton, who died after carrying Jason,
 Leo, and Piper through a blizzard, but was later
 "resurrected" by Leo Valdez for usage on the Argo II.
Atropos: Now, you can't blame me for that last one.
 That was all Khione. 

Clotho: (ignoring her) The winner is... 
Zoe Nightshade!

(Audience claps half-heartedly, trying to 
hold back tears in their eyes. Zoe appears on the 
background screen, appearing live from Elysium)

Zoe: I am not quite sure how to react to this.
 I had lived on the earth for thousands of years, 
and it was my time to pass. It pleases me to 
know that I have served my Lady Artemis well. 
You should not feel sorrow over my death, 
for I knew it would come to pass eventually. 
However, it is a great honor to be so 
well-liked that my death would be considered
 heart-breaking. I thank thee very greatly.

(Zoe's face disappears from screen and Fates exit)

Hermes: That was truly touching.

Apollo: I'm sure my sister would agree that 
her legacy will live on forever.

Hermes: It is true. 

Apollo: While you all dry your tears, 
we will take a short commercial break. 
I  will be backstage writing a poem about 
this heart-wrenching experience. (sniffles)
Stuck in guinea pig 
form on Circe's island?
 Captured by ninja turtles? 
Ready to hop into battle
 with giants or Titans? 
Grab some Hermes' 
Multivitamins: They 
can do anything!

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